i don’t know what to do, everything reminds me of you.
I have so many thoughts, feelings, hopes. It’s hard to decipher what will really happen and what I just so badly WANT to happen. It’s been a while since I’ve had a song speak to me in the way this one does. I literally love him so much that it hurts. And I know it isn’t healthy. More than just that- I know it isn’t mutual, yet I choose to stay and hope he will love me the way I love him. I know that people love to the best of their ability. And I know that because I can clearly see things aren’t how they used to be, I should walk away. But I can’t. I’m not ready. I’m scared to be without him because he makes me so happy. I get knots in my stomach, the feeling that makes you not want to eat- thinking about him not being in my life in that way. He makes me want to be better. I’m so lost. I hate this.
“Anywhere, I would’ve followed you” “Say something I’m giving up on you”
“And I, will swallow my pride. You’re the one that I love, and I’m saying goodbye”
This- this song speaks volumes. Bring tears to my eyes. Why are we faced with such big, life altering decisions?